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Joel M.’s Story

Sherman, TX

My prayer is that my story, Miss Myrna's story, will help save someone’s life and to wake up and arouse others to join the fight against this evil.

Why are more people not waking up to this evil?

Miss Myrna

“Her medical records indicated that they had been giving her breath-suppressing drugs like Ativan, fentanyl, Precedex, morphine, and midazolam for up to six weeks.”

This is the story of my wife Myrna L. Morrow. She was fondly called Miss Myrna. We got married on April 11, 1999. We both had children from previous marriages. Myrna had 4 and I had 3. I lost Myrna on January 20, 2021.


Myrna had been hospitalized for 97 days and had been on a ventilator for 95 days. On the morning of January 20, 2021, I was on the treadmill at a fitness center when I received a call wanting to know how soon I could get to the hospital for a meeting. I said, “about 11.” I was not told what the meeting was about. So I called Myrna's daughter, not certain if they wanted her there too. For the past month, we had not been allowed to visit Myrna (they claimed there had been a new outbreak of COVID.) And from that time on we could only see her through the window and most of the time she'd be asleep (highly sedated).


My stepdaughter and I arrived at the hospital at about 11 a.m. and the doctor met us in the lobby. My stepdaughter immediately pleaded with him to let us see her mom. They let us go back to the ICU and we saw that she was highly sedated. The doctor and the PA told us that Myrna had asked to be unplugged from the vent. (I am not sure how she was able to communicate since she could not talk with the trachea tube.) They said she indicated her wishes by blinking her eye and wiggling her finger.


We were told that Myrna had COPD and the only other option was to put her in a nursing home still attached to the ventilator. During the 97 days that Myrna had been in the hospital she had survived Covid-19, Remdesivir, and intubation, she had also developed ARDS, and had contracted sepsis and mercer infections, but this was my first time hearing about COPD. COPD is a disease for which there is supposedly no remedy. Essentially, they had given up on Myrna, saying that she would not tolerate weaning from the ventilator and that she could not exchange blood gases (CO2).


(Her medical records indicated that they had been giving her breath-suppressing drugs like Ativan, fentanyl, Precedex, morphine, and midazolam for up to six weeks prior to unplugging her. By the way, midazolam, also called Versed, is the same drug that was used in the spring of 2020 to eliminate thousands of elderly people in care homes in the United Kingdom --- the same way Remdesivir was being used in the U.S. It is the same drug used in lethal injections. Both the U.S and the U.K have very high death tolls compared to the rest of the world based on population.)


They Euthanized Her


After the doctor told us about his assessment of COPD, I said, "Doc, can we try one more thing? Ivermectin." He acted as though he didn't hear me. I had already plead with him to try high dose IV vitamin C, offering to sign a waiver, and by the time they got around to it, it was too late. The vitamin C may have worked if they had given it to her earlier.

I did not press the issue of the Ivermectin, because I was not sure if it would have worked, that is if she really had COPD. I agreed to allow her to be unplugged. They turned the sedatives down for a while to allow Myrna to "wake up" and allowed her daughter and me to spend about an hour talking to her and holding her hands. They said they wanted to give her a sedative in preparation for when they would unplug her and sent us out of the room.


We waited for several minutes and they came and told us it would take a bit longer. Finally, they came and said we could go back to her room. She was breathing on her own, albeit somewhat laboriously. We held her hands and I was praying that she would survive -- I had heard of people surviving being unplugged. Little did I know (I later learned from getting her hospital records) that they had euthanized her on heavy doses of morphine, Ativan, and midazolam (what they give prisoners on death row).


The Scare Tactics

“They said that if her oxygen dropped below 92, she could have a cardiac arrest.”

It all started on October 15, 2020. Myrna had been ailing for a few days, sleeping a lot. She had told me she was just tired. And she kept mostly to herself in a dark room. I had been in and out of the house. I wasn't really paying close attention and she never complained. On the evening of the 14th, I tried to get her out of the bed and go outside to get some sunshine, but she got back in bed. The next morning, I called her daughter who came over and asked Myrna if she thought she had COVID. Her answer was “yes.” I panicked and immediately called the EMT who took her to Texoma Medical Center. She got there at about 10 a.m. and we were separated, not being able to see each other nor communicate. They wanted to vent her. We both said "no" because we were aware of what had happened in New York. They said that if her oxygen dropped below 92, she could have a cardiac arrest. Still, we said, “no ventilator.” They then told me I had to sign a DNR (which I was not told what the legal ramifications were). I did sign it. And I went on to tell them I wanted them to use Dr. Richard Bartlett's protocol of budesonide, zinc, and vitamin C (I didn't recall all the details).


Later I was told that Myrna had changed her mind about the vent, someone had scared her into changing her mind. I didn't say anything and left the decision up to her. (I knew that your chances of surviving a vent were about 20 percent -- terrible odds! And now I kick myself for not questioning her decision.)


I did not know at the time that Myrna's oxygen was 96 percent when she arrived at the hospital. They gave her morphine a few hours after she arrived and put her on a 5-day regimen of Remdesivir (the first day-- a double dose). Late into the night, her oxygen level began to drop and they put her on high-flow heated oxygen, which was increased to 15L until her oxygen began to come back up. On Oct 17 she was intubated.


On A Slippery Slope

“Many of the sedatives, Precedex, midazolam, fentanyl, Ativan, Propofol, and morphine (dangerous and addictive) were suppressing her breathing.”

Texoma Medical Center had relatively liberal visitation. The COVID patients were in a negative pressure room and you could look in through the window. One visitor at a time was allowed and you could come back. (This was unlike Carrus Specialty Hospital which she was transferred to after she tested negative for COVID.) They never fully explained that Myrna would go from being intubated, then given a trachea and then a stomach peg -- I certainly would have objected! We were on a slippery slope and we couldn't turn back!


During the time Myrna was at TMC her blood sugar was off the chart and she was given a lot of insulin even though she was not diabetic. Her X-Ray analysis hedged on whether she had pneumonia or pulmonary edema. She was given Precedex on two occasions. She was also given lots of fentanyl, and she got midazolam for the first time on Oct. 23.

Most of the time, Myrna had her hands restrained to prevent her from grabbing the tubes. She suffered from edema despite being on Lasix. One day she gained over seven pounds. It is hard for me to relive the torture I witnessed--knowing that this did not have to happen!


On November 15, 2020, after 30 days in TMC and 28 days on the vent, Myrna was transferred to Carrus Specialty Hospital, still on the vent. According to their records, Carrus had a 28-day recovery plan, but after being there for about 2 or 3 weeks they started talking about palliative care. At the time I wasn't sure what that was. It seemed like she was not making any progress.


My concerns were that they were not doing anything to heal her. Obviously, Myrna had sustained some kind of lung injury and I do not believe it was from COVID. All they were giving her were steroids, sedatives, and antibiotics and many of these drugs were counteracting each other. Some were causing her blood pressure to drop and she had to be given drugs to bring her blood pressure back up. Some drugs were causing her blood sugar to spike and they gave her insulin to bring it down. Many of the sedatives, Precedex, midazolam, fentanyl, Ativan, Propofol, and morphine (dangerous and addictive) were suppressing her breathing, and they had the gall to comment that they were unable to wean her off the ventilator, and also made comments about her mental state as being lethargic, anxious, agitated, and unable to follow instructions.

People Need To Wake Up


Did she have COPD? For the most part, they had been saying she had ARDS; I was told at the very end that she had trouble expelling carbon dioxide (exchanging gas). Looking at her records there was a pattern worsening. Also, for more than a month while at Carrus Hospital (from late November on) she was on Midazolam, Precedex, Fentanyl, and Propofol.


When I recommended trying high dose IV vitamin C, along with vitamin D (Dr. Paul Marik's protocol) they pooh-poohed my idea. (High dose vitamin C, which is an anti-inflammatory/anti-oxidant could have accomplished the same thing the toxic drugs were supposed to.) I recently learned that one of the side effects of administering Precedex for a period over 24 hours is ARDS!


To add insult to injury, both hospitals milked my insurance for all they could get, to the tune of $1.5 million, and then wanted to get rid of her. I still get billed for charges my insurance did not cover - bills from the doctor who made the decision to give Myrna the Remdesivir. As recently as four months ago, this hospital is still using this same deadly protocol.

It has been going on for two years since Myrna got sick. She touched so many lives in so many positive ways. We shared so many things. I still shake my head and wonder: how did this happen? Why did it happen? Why are more people not waking up to this evil? I am trying to be positive. And be thankful for the time we had. And thankful for my two daughters who live 300 miles away, who left their families and drove up to check on me and to see Miss Myrna. - Yeah, that's what everybody called her and sometimes I call her that myself. And I am thankful for my stepdaughter Angie who stood by as a caregiver and helped me with my wife's funeral planning.


My prayer is that my story, Miss Myrna's story, will help save someone’s life and to wake up and arouse others to join the fight against this evil.


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